You have to continuously work on all the relationships in your life and marriage is no exception. There are no magic words that you can say to make everything better, but there are tiny things you can do and say every day that can encourage and nurture a happy marriage.
From day one, when you walk down the aisle and say “I do” to your partner, every gesture you make contributes to a good or bad relationship. Of course, sometimes it’s a matter of faith, but don’t we believe that faith is in our hands? So, what is the key that opens the door to ‘happily ever after’?
Honor thy vows
Remember that you chose that person who was standing next to you in one of the happiest moments of your life, to have and to hold, from that day forward, and you have pledged yourself to them. Never forget the exciting moment when you first met, the engagement, when you were both getting ready to say “I do”, when you were nervously waiting in a satin robe to put on your perfect wedding dress and say those vows, believing in them truly and deeply. Remember those moments when you feel like the bonds might be broken, and then you might remember that they are stronger than ever.
You, me and we
Many people think that once they enter into marriage life, they will renounce ‘me and you’ and become ‘we’. That kind of opinion can influence your marriage relationship worse than it might seem. Too much independence, indeed, can cause a rift in the marriage, but it is also important that each person feels valued as an individual.
You could have another friend to talk to without your significant other (it doesn’t have to be some big secret, but sometimes you need to tell something to someone that isn’t your partner), and vice versa.
Fix the problem
A nice metaphor that crosses my mind when I think about marriage problems is that old lady who is saying that marriage is like a house; when the light turns off, you don’t just go and buy a new house, you change the bulb. So any problem you might have, share it with your partner and try to solve it by talking.
When there is love and respect, other misunderstandings and troubles can be easily fixed. Talking, in general, is one of the main keys to a happy marriage. Always share the things that you are going through, with your beloved one.
The gift that keeps on giving
This is an expression used for generosity and you can right away see the truth in it. Generosity between spouses is one of the keys for a happy long lasting marriage. Couples that give to each other tend to be happier than those who don’t. Even the slightest tokens of appreciation may affect your marriage in a profoundly positive way. Buying his favourite chocolate bar when you’re going to grocery store, or a wild flower he picked up just for you.
When you are giving, you are basically showing your partner just how important he is for you.
Nourish your love
The one key that opens every door: love. In a marriage, love comes in many forms: forgiving, serving, preserving, guarding, celebrating and renewing. Every form is equally important. A marriage is more like a marathon than it is a sprint. So you should preserve your love and understand how it can evolve from youthful passion to mature understanding. There is a long path from ‘I do’ to ‘happily ever after’, but it’s a path two persons should walk hand in hand, trusting and loving each other.